


The "Bare Bones" of Gardening

by sabrepanther



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Flowey is still a weed, Fluff and Humor, Gardens & Gardening, Gift Fic, Humor, Papyrus learns about gardening and plants from Asgore, Plants, Post-Undertale Pacifist Route, close encounters of the plant kind, plant trivia, undertale - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:00:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28464963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sabrepanther/pseuds/sabrepanther
Summary: After a certain incident with a flower bouquet, Asgore invites Papyrus over to his home to learn about plants. (In other words, a skeleton wanders into the den of a true horticulture nerd and it becomes a day long adventure)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SuperKirbylover](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuperKirbylover/gifts).



> Dedicated to SKL, aka SuperKirbylover
> 
> SKL is an amazing artist and writer. PLEASE do check out their stuff at https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuperKirbylover/pseuds/SuperKirbylover

It was a beautiful day outside Toriel’s home that Sunday afternoon. Birds were singing, and the enormous bouquet of flowers bloomed magnificently in the middle of the living room. Party banners and balloons covered the entire interior of that room. The presents had been opened and the cake messily devoured, with suspicious, icing-covered dog tracks leading away from it. By now, most of the guests had already departed for the day after giving the human their well wishes. The party had been a wild success, for the most part.

Despite the cheerful-looking surroundings, the living room felt gloomy as a foggy, rainy day, due to the skeleton wearing an uncharacteristic frown while sitting despondently in his chair.

“It’s ok Papyrus, you didn’t know.” Undyne said, trying to comfort him. “The ivy in the flowers just made Frisk a little itchy!”

“BUT, BUT… JUST LOOK AT THEM!” Papyrus gestured wildly with his gloved hands at the human.

Toriel was treating the child in the kitchen. Even from the living room, the monsters could see the large, splotches of red covering their arms and face. Toriel scolded them now and then about scratching the rashes. Frisk turned and squinted at Papyrus from the one eye that wasn’t swollen shut, and gave him an encouraging thumbs up.

Undyne smiled and waved back at the human. “See! They're fine! It’ll take more than a few stupid plants to knock them down, remember?!”

Asgore winced at the human’s appearance, but nodded in agreement. “Indeed. While humans (and hamsters for some odd reason) are highly allergic to poison oak, it is a common plant allergy and not overly dangerous. Frisk should recover in no time.”

Still, the skeleton looked dejected and groaned, “I KNEW I SHOULD HAVE STUCK WITH MY BONE GIFTS. BUT... I JUST WANTED TO CHANGE IT UP THIS YEAR!

WHEN I HEARD THAT FRISK WAS BANNED FROM BRINGING FLOWEY TO SCHOOL, AND DIDN’T HAVE A PLANT FOR THE SCIENCE YEAR-LONG PLANT-GROWING PROJECT, I THOUGHT I’D GET THEM A SUBSTITUTE!

I FOUND A COOL-LOOKING FERN AND BOUGHT IT A MONTH IN ADVANCE, BECAUSE EVERYONE KNOWS THAT THEY SHOULD DO THEIR PRESENT SHOPPING EARLY… INSTEAD OF WAITING TILL THE LAST MINUTE LIKE SOME PEOPLE!!”

Papyrus gave a not-so-subtle, side-eye in the couch’s direction. Another monster was lying down on the couch, hidden from view by the massive bouquet of flowers.

A slightly muffled voice came from behind the flowers. “hey... i just didn’t want to be “rash” about picking a gift.”

The rashly-made pun filled the room with dead air for several moments. In response, both Papyrus and Undyne chucked their paper-napkin balls at Sans. The various bits of party trash soared over the flower bouquet and found its target, bouncing off San’s skull and falling onto the floor.

“worth it.”

Asgore chuckled.

Papyrus gave another irritated glance in Sans direction, but sighed resignedly and continued. “BROTHERLY PROCRASTINATION ASIDE, WHEN I WENT TO GET IT OUT OF MY CLOSET THIS MORNING, IT WAS ALL BROWN! THERE WASN’T ANY TIME LEFT, SO I WENT INTO THE WOODS, AND FL-

I MEAN, A GOOD FRIEND HELPED ME PICK OUT SOME FLOWERS AND PLANTS FOR A LAST-MINUTE BIRTHDAY BOUQUET! WITH SOME CAREFUL ARRANGING, I THINK IT TURNED OUT LOOKING EVEN BETTER THAN THE FERN!”

Papyrus turned and looked at the flowers on the coffee table. The bouquet of flowers was truly massive, standing roughly four feet tall off the coffee table. The various yellow flowers, ferns, and ivy encircled a carefully sculpted section of white and red flowers. The white flowers in the center took on a certain familiar face shape with the red flowers gathered underneath and flaring off to the side in a line, like a dramatic scarf.

Papyrus scratched his chin with a gloved hand, then straightened back up with a smile as he beheld his floral artistry. “WELL, AT LEAST THE YELLOW FLOWERS SHOULD STILL LOOK FINE IF I REMOVE THE IVY.”

A sneeze suddenly came from the couch behind the bouquet.

“uh about that pap, i just got a closer look at those yellow flowers and i hate to tell you but…”

“You’ll want to leave out those yellow ones as those are unfortunately, um Sneezeweed.” Asgore said.

“SNEEZEWEED??”

“And the white ones too. Those are Poison Hemlock.”

“POISON HEMLOCK??” The skeleton sagged as he looked at the flowers in horror. “AWW MAN.”

Asgore patted Papyrus on the back. “It’s quite all right. Many surface plants look similar and it can be hard to tell which are safe for different species, even to an experienced botanist as myself. Do you by any chance still have that plant? I can try looking at it and see if there is anything I can do.”

“WELL, YES BUT...” Papyrus grimaced as he pulled a very sad-looking, potted plant from behind the couch. It was completely blackened and brown. The potting soil was almost overflowing with moldy and dank water. The fern was obviously dead and beyond saving.

“Oh dear…” Asgore inspected the deceased plant. “And you said you left it in the closet for… a month?”

“YES? I MADE SURE IT HAD A LOT OF WATER BEFORE PUTTING IT IN THE CLOSET. OH NO! DID IT SUFFOCATE??”

“No, rather I believe it was the lack of sun. Unlike the plants underground that live off water and magic, the surface plants rely on the sun to live.”

“BUT THAT STILL MEANS I KILLED IT! I’M A HERBACIDIST NOW!”

“it's quite alright! It was an honest mistake after all.”

Despite the words of encouragement, Papyrus sagged further down in his chair.

The former king hated to see the skeleton’s usually-cheerful face so downcast. He stroked his goatee, trying to think of how to raise his spirits.

“Say, I will be home all day tomorrow. I have many potted plants to spare in my garden. If you like, I can help you pick out a new one."

Papyrus’s eyes popped out in surprise from the boss monster’s kind offer. “REALLY??”

“Yeah!!” Undyne roared and slapped Papyrus on the back (nearly knocking him off the chair), “And he’ll totally train you on how to keep those wimpy plants alive! Right big guy?”

“Er, teach him? Oh yes Papyrus. If you like, I would more than glad to teach you about surface plants.” Asgore’s face brightened considerably at Undyne’s suggestion.

“WOWEE... I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS.” Suddenly Papyrus bounded out of the chair and began shaking Asgore’s hand vigorously.

“THANK YOU VERY MUCH YOUR MAJESTY! I WON’T LET YOU DOWN! I’LL BE THERE EXTRA EARLY TOMORROW!

IN FACT! I’LL GO TO THE LIBRARY RIGHT NOW SO I CAN PROPERLY READ UP ON PLANTS AND PREPARE FOR THE LESSONS!”

“You’re quite welcome! But-”

A very loud and hearty “NYEH HEH HEH!” drowned out Asgore’s words and the tall skeleton didn’t hear him. He saluted the former king, and suddenly bounded out the front door. The sound of the door slamming echoed all throughout the house, leaving the two monsters in silence as they watched Papyrus run and disappear into the distance from the window.

“Oh dear... I don’t think he realizes the human libraries are closed on Sundays.”

“Fhu hu hu hu!!” Undyne cackled. “You have to love that guy’s energy and passion!! He’ll be there and back here before you know it.”

Toriel’s voice suddenly called from the kitchen. “Hello? Could one of you please go into the bathroom and bring me the tube of “calamari” lotion? ... Wait, did I say something funny, Frisk? Oh! I apologize! It will be a tube labeled “calamine” lotion.”

Asgore raised his voice in reply. “I’ll bring it for you. Please excuse me. Oh... I suppose I should take these outside as well.”

The tall boss monster picked up the bouquet, being careful not to disturb or inhale any of the sneezeweed’s pollen. He sidestepped awkwardly between the chair and the couch, trying not to disturb the furniture with his large frame.

As Asgore lumbered away towards the bathroom and ducked to avoid hitting the doorway with his horns, Undyne’s eye widened with a sudden realization.

“Oh shoot!! Hey Sans?

Sans?

Hey! WAKE UP!!” Undyne kicked the couch. The couch lurched violently with a slight, woody, cracking sound. The snores emanating from it stopped, followed by a groan.

“oww. geez undy, do you have a vendetta against couches or something?”

“Look, when Papyrus gets back, can you PLEASE make sure to remind him that when he goes tomorrow, he should go during the DAY, not in the middle of the night like LAST time??”

“huh? tomorrow?”

Undyne rolled her eye. “Asgore’s house! You know that thing we were just talking about not even a minute ago? The ex-king is going to teach your brother how to keep surface plants alive!”

“ohhh, that thing. sure, i’ll remind him.”

She sighed in exasperation. “You’d better be sure! Papyrus may not need to sleep but the rest of us do. Asgore’s sleep schedule is on the line here, so DON’T forget! Got it?”

“no worries. i’ll remember,” the short skeleton said groggily as he settled back into a comfortable position on the couch and resumed his nap.

*****

_“Knock, knock, knock!”_

_“Knock, knock, knock!”_

_The persistent knocks echoed through Asgore's home. The lights switched on, followed by a series of quickly-moving, heavy-sounding footsteps growing louder as they approached the front door. The door opened, revealing a frazzled and sleepy-looking Asgore. His mane and fur were bedkept and messy._

_“Howdy! I do apologize. I believe I quite overslept. I hope I didn’t keep you waiting very long?”_

_“NOT AT ALL YOUR MAJESTY! RATHER! I AM GLAD TO SEE SOMEONE ALSO APPRECIATES THE EARLY MORNING HOURS AS I DO!”_

_Asgore yawned, and tried to smooth out his messy mane with his paw, “Oh! It’s still morning? Oh, that's a big relief! I think my clock must be fast. It said 2:10, so I thought I’d slept past noon!”_

_“THAT IS CONCERNING REGARDING YOUR CLOCK AND I HOPE IT IS FIXED SOON!_

_BUT WORRY NOT! MY PHONE CLOCK IS EXTRA ACCURATE! AND FROM LOOKING AT IT, IT’S INDEED 2:01!”_

_“Only 2 o’clock, good to know.” The boss monster stifled another yawn, then blinked as his brain digested the meaning of the skeleton’s words._

_“Wait, do you mean to say it’s 2:00 in the morning?”_

_“2:02 AM NOW TO BE PRECISE!”_

_The night breeze suddenly blew through the opened door and wafted into the home. It smelled fresh and new, unlike the often-stifling air of the Underground. Asgore looked out the opened door, noticed the glimmering stars in the sky, and remembered._

_They were on the surface; it was morning, and it was in the middle of the night. He turned back and looked at the fidgeting, smiling skeleton saluting him, ready and eager for his herbology training._

_"Ah.”_


	2. Chapter 2

The morning sun shone through his windows, pleasantly warm. When Asgore woke up, he was surprised to find himself on the couch instead of in his bed. A blanket covered him, and a now-cold cup of tea sat on the tray by the couch. 

Asgore blinked in confusion and shook his head. Had he woken up in the middle of the night, gotten a drink, and dozed off on the couch? His memory of the night’s events was quite foggy. At the most he could recall that he went to bed, had a vivid dream, and that dream was about oversleeping and Papyrus coming... 

His eyes suddenly widened. Oversleeping? He quickly sat up from the couch and whirled around to check the ancient grandfather clock behind him, then breathed a long sigh in relief. 

It was still around 8 o’clock in the morning. It’d merely been a dream after all. 

The king gave one final long yawn that showed off his lion-like fangs and stretched his muscles. As he slowly stood up from the human-made couch, it creaked loudly in relief as it wasn’t designed for carrying large boss monsters. Asgore still didn’t feel completely rested, but for now it was a bright new morning on the surface. A guest was coming soon, and it was time for his usual morning tea blend. 

The monster walked over to his kitchen and began to hum a cheerful tune as he filled the kettle with water. He placed it on the stove. He still wasn’t comfortable yet with all of the new-fangled stove settings, so he stuck with using old-fashioned fire magic, a carefully controlled magical flame hovering just under the stove grate. The kettle began to heat quickly. 

Next, he opened the cabinet. There were many mugs, cups, and saucers of all shapes and sizes. Many had their own memories, some happy and many bittersweet, reminding him of places, people, and things. He brought out an old cup. It had been made for him, with flower designs drawn childishly over it. Yes, the floral theme would fit well today. He thought they would have agreed too. It was set down on the counter.

Now, to pick one for his coming guest. Asgore was somewhat proud of his cup collection, many suited for various types of monsters. It was a bit of a game for him as well, picking the perfect cup for a guest to use and enjoy. 

“Mmm… I wonder which one Papyrus would like?” 

“THAT ONE WITH THE SKULL AND CROSSBONES PLEASE!” said Papyrus enthusiastically, standing right behind Asgore. 

Needless to say, the startled bellow of the boss monster reverberated all through the house, soon followed by the sound of several cups and saucers crashing and falling to the floor. 

***** 

_(10 minutes later and broken dishes cleaned up)_

Since VERY early morning, Papyrus had been waiting very patiently for the King to finish waking up. It was the very first thing he’d learned from Undyne. And that was to wait to speak to her until she had her first sip of coffee and directly addressed him. As the former king was the one who trained Undyne, he was very careful to follow this rule. Once Asgore had stirred from the couch, he was very pleased to see his majesty shout so enthusiastically when he picked out his cup! It was much like Undyne’s house with the familiar sounds of shattering pots and dishes.

Once the broken cups were cleaned up, Papyrus had opted for some warm milk. Papyrus’s cup had fortunately survived the fall. There were a couple cracks over the skull picture but the cup itself was still watertight. The two then sat around the kitchen table, and Asgore sipped from his floral teacup with a slightly shaking paw. 

Once Asgore finished his tea (and started to look a good deal calmer), he got dressed in his gardening gear that included a pink floral shirt, an apron, and a straw hat with openings for his horns (very fashionable, Papyrus thought). Then the former king brought him outside to his garden in the backyard. It was a colorful, beautiful sight. There were a wide variety of bushes, flowers, artistically trimmed topiaries in the shape of various monsters, a shed filled with gardening supplies, and a large greenhouse. 

First, Asgore described all the things plants generally needed to survive. Soil, water, and the all-so-important sun. The most fascinating thing the skeleton thought was how plants ate the sunlight with their leaves and made breathable air. No magic required! 

The skeleton wasn’t sure why it was called “photosynthesis,” especially as he’s never seen a plant take a picture, but ultimately decided it was because so many plants and flowers look photogenic. He already had many selfies with Flowey so he was sure Flowey would agree! He also couldn’t help but notice how the usually somber-looking king’s eyes lit up while talking about his garden. It reminded him of how San’s eyes glowed brightly whenever he rambled about astronomy, and it reminded him of the passionate energy Alphys radiated whenever someone dared mentioned Mew Mew Kissy Cutie within 100 feet of her. 

Papyrus quite understood! Everyone had the one thing that they were passionate about, and for the king it was plants. They only needed someone to listen to them talking about their passions, and Papyrus was more than happy to be that someone today.

One by one, Asgore pointed out the various flower kinds and he knew all their names. Each plant had two names, a weird sciency-sounding one, and another regular name. Many of the plant names sounded like Asgore had named them himself. (Honestly with the king’s age, Papyrus wouldn’t have been surprised if this was the case). 

The mission today had initially been to find a new plant for Steven, as well as to learn the basics of plants, but soon the conversations kept shifting to various obscure trivia and plant lore. It was shaping up to be a day-long endeavor, for Papyrus had stepped into the den of a true horticulture nerd. 

***** 

“SO YOU’RE SAYING... THAT PLANTS CAN CLONE THEMSELVES?”

Papyrus eyed the grafted branches on the fruit tree and looked back at Asgore. He was briefly reminded of the day when he first met Toriel. 

“That’s right! Many plant species can reproduce through self-cloning, like King’s Holly, potatoes, strawberries and tomatoes, and many others. And these are living branches that broke off their original trees. If planted or grafted correctly, it can grow into a new tree. Other plants can self clone themselves via roots that sprout new buds. Ah that reminds me… I look forward to visiting Old Pando someday.

“WHAT’S A PANDO?”

“It’s a large grove of aspens that my grandfather used to visit. Each tree is a clone of itself, and a shared root system. And it was even older than he was! It was difficult to tell its age but I think by now, it would be at least 80,000 years old! Ho ho, to see them again would make me feel young again. You would like Aspen trees, I think. With their leaf shapes, they sound like rain on a windy day.” 

“WOWIE, I’D VERY MUCH LIKE TO SEE THEM TOO! BUT... WHY ARE YOU PUTTING THOSE BRANCHES ON THE TREE?” 

“Oh! I want to try a mixed fruit tree! I’m combining different species of branches on one tree so it makes different fruits.” 

“SO… YOU’RE STICKING DIFFERENT PLANTS TOGETHER… INTO ONE LARGE GIANT PLANT?” He was suddenly reminded of something. 

“Correct! This one branch is from a pomegranate tree, this other one from a pear tree, this one from a plum tree, and…”

Asgore’s list of fruits began to pass through the skeleton’s figurative ear and out the other, as Papyrus stared at the fruit tree amalgamate in mild horror. 

***** 

“I DIDN’T REALIZE THERE WERE SO MANY KINDS OF GRASSES! OR THAT BAMBOO IS ALSO A GRASS. IT LOOKS MORE LIKE A TREE I THINK!” 

“Indeed! Grasses make up almost a third of all plant life. Before the underground and the barrier, I once traveled to Asia. I remember seeing bamboo fields at least 15 times taller than I am now. And maybe, I may have a chance to revisit them someday now that we are free and on the surface. It’ll take a long time though for this bamboo shoot to grow that big though. The other grasses potted here are common varieties and have many uses. Kentucky bluegrass, for example, is good for lawns.” 

“BLUEGRASS! ISN’T THAT A MUSICAL PLANT?” 

“Sadly, it is not.” 

“AWW.” 

“Aside from cosmetic uses in lawns, any grasses are farmed. Rye, wheat, rice, corn, catnip, beets and others.”

“WAIT A MINUTE, YOU HAVE CATNIP? CATNIP IS ACTUALLY LEGAL HERE?”

Asgore coughed and looked slightly nervous. “Well... yes. The non-magical infused kind at least.” 

Papyrus stared at the large patch of catnip grass. “I SEE. MMM AND IT LOOKS LIKE IT’S DOING ITS USUAL JOB OF ATTRACTING CATS TOO!” 

“Oh dear.” Asgore walked over. 

Alphy’s purple feline friend was hiding in the cat grass. Her eyes were glazed over as she nibbled on the grass. Next to her was another cat in a MTT restaurant employee outfit. He was rolling a joint with the catweed. 

“Not again.” Asgore sighed. “Papyrus, could you hand me the hose, the one with the spray nozzle on it?” 

***** 

Papyrus stared at the orchid flower’s faces, and their black eyes stared back at him. A bead of sweat began to form on the side of his skull. 

“JUST TO BE SURE, THESE AREN’T ALIVE LIKE FLOWEY… RIGHT?” 

“Oh, ho ho! No, they are not. This is my Monkeyface Orchid. Funny looking, aren’t they? I always get a chuckle out of them.” 

“BUT WHY DO THEY LOOK THAT THAT? IT’S WEIRD!” 

“Hard to say, many plants and orchid species especially can look like other animals, or objects. Some for pollination purposes to attract animals like bees, flies, and wasps.” 

Asgore pointed out a different orchid nearby. “The Laughing Bumble Bee orchid here is one of several orchid species that have a flower that looks just like an insect. And the ones next to it are the Fly Orchid and Hammer Orchid. They even smell like one of their fellow insects to attract them!” 

Asgore showed off some vines to the side with pipe-like flowers, and there was another dark, meaty-colored flower. “The younger ones seem to like this one a lot too.”

The skeleton stared at the dark flower’s face for several moments, trying to rack his skull for why it looked familiar, then he realized. “THAT FLOWER’S FACE… WAIT, IT CAN’T BE!” 

“Yes, that is a subspecies of Aristolochia called the Darth Vader Flower. You came at just the right time! It only blooms for about a week.” 

“WOWEE! AND THAT ONE THERE LOOKS LIKE A WHITE BIRD!” 

“My White Egret Orchid.” Asgore beamed.

“AND THAT ONE LOOKS LIKE A BALLERINA!” 

“Ballerina Orchid, well named I think!” 

AND THESE ONES LOOK JUST LIKE RED LIPS!” 

“Yes, those are called hoo…” Asgore suddenly paused as he mulled over the flower’s common name. 

“Er. Let's just call them Psychotria Elata.” 

This was one of several plants in the garden whose common names Asgore declined to say while in the presence of the young skeleton. 

***** 

The vines orchids weren’t the only plants with odd appearances in the greenhouse. Papyrus found some colorful rocks in pots. “I SEE YOU’RE RAISING ROCK PETS TOO! MAYBE YOU CAN GIVE MY BROTHER SOME POINTERS.”

“Those are lithops, a desert succulent plant. Neat huh?” 

“THEY’RE PLANTS? AREN’T PLANTS SUPPOSED TO HAVE LEAVES AND STEMS?”

“They're leaves fused together, most of the plant itself is under the soil. Oh! Fun fact, not all plants have roots, stems or leaves!” 

“I WOULD NEVER RECOGNIZE THEM IF I WALKED BY ONE IN THE WILD!” Papyrus picked up one of the rocks and admired it. “AND THIS GREY ONE IS COOL TOO!”

“I’m not a plant, I'm a rock!” said the rock. “And can you PLEASE put me down??” 

Papyrus nearly dropped the rock monster in surprise. “WHOOPSIE!” He set it down on the ground gently. “I’M SORRY! I THOUGHT YOU WERE A PLANT! I MEAN... A ROCK, ER, I MEANT-” 

“Hmph!” the lithop-looking monster huffed as it slid out of the greenhouse door.

“WELL, THAT WAS AWKWARD.” 

***** 

Each of the plants in the garden had tags with their names on the front, and with more details and symbols on the back. Asgore spent some time teaching Papyrus what each symbol meant. Some indicated the seasons the plant needed, the soil type, how much water it needed, how much sun it needed, as well as any warnings if the plant had any toxicity to or humans and certain species. Many of the common plants in the garden, like the buttercups, had such toxicity warnings. 

The skeleton frowned, remembering the events of yesterday. The many plant names and facts were starting to get mixed up in his skull, and he was feeling a little overwhelmed. 

“SO MANY PLANTS ARE VERY BAD FOR HUMANS! AND THE ONES IN THE WILD DON’T HAVE TAGS. I’M GOING TO HAVE TO GET A REFERENCE BOOK TO KEEP TRACK OF THEM. AT LEAST SKELETONS ARE RESISTANT TO PLANT DAMAGE!”

In that moment for some reason, Flowey popped into his mind, but Papyrus shoved that thought away, for Flowey was his friend and wouldn’t hurt him! 

“Indeed, I have to keep books myself. Some of these plants are new to me as well, and frankly, we are all still learning about the surface world. Oh! That reminds me, one minute please.” 

Asgore stepped into his home, and soon came out with a thick picture book. “Here. This has reference pictures for the surface plants in this part of the world and I had an additional copy. You can keep it. And you are also more than welcome to ask me if you have any questions on plants you see.”

Papyrus took the book and saluted the former king. “THANK YOU VERY MUCH YOUR MAJESTY!” 

“You’re quite welcome! Oh dear, it’s already late in the afternoon. I hope I haven’t talked your ear off, er, figuratively speaking. It must be a lot for you, especially as you’re new to horticulture!” 

“NOT TO WORRY! I GREATLY ENJOYED IT!” 

“I did as well.” Asgore smiled, then his expression shifted to that of puzzlement. “Mmm. I feel like I’m forgetting something. Was there something else you needed today?”

“YOU’VE DEFINITELY TAUGHT ME PLANT BASICS TODAY AND MORE! AND I’LL BE MAKING PLANS FOR YOUR NEW CATNIP TRAP SOON! NYEH HEH HEH! 

BUT ODDLY... I ALSO FEEL LIKE I AM FORGETTING SOMETHING. BUT WHAT?”

Papyrus tapped on his skull with a gloved hand and pondered. Asgore stroked his beard deep in thought. After several moments thinking, both monsters suddenly remembered and in unison exclaimed. 

“FRISK’S PLANT!” 

***** 

After a full day of getting _completely_ sidetracked with plant trivia, Papyrus and Asgore walked all over the garden again trying to decide which was best for the young human. After an hour, they’d finally decided on one. It was a very prickly, yet cute-looking cactus with blossoms. The skeleton was sure his friend Alphys would have a certain term describing it, but he couldn’t remember the word. He’d have to ask her about it later. 

Asgore had also offered the skeleton a starter plant for one of his own, but Papyrus politely declined. He doubted that he would truly be up to taking care of a new pet plant full time. At home, he already had the responsibility of looking after Sans and his neglected pet rock. Not to mention, he already had Flowey, a literal talking flower, as a friend! 

However, when he was walking to the greenhouse’s exit, he saw something in the corner of his eyesocket that caused him to stop in his tracks. 

It was in a shallow pot with roots and moss sprawled over its base. A small gnarly trunk grew up with various branches and tiny leaves shaped carefully. It looked like a tree, but a strangely small version of a tree. There were also a few other smaller miniature trees in other pots beside it. The skeleton couldn’t help but make a beeline right towards the miniature trees. 

“Oh! Did you see one you liked?” 

There was a sparkle starting to light up in his eyesockets as the skeleton admired the tiny tree. “ASGORE! DIDN’T KNOW YOU HAD ACTION FIGURE TREES! THEY LOOK SO REAL!” 

“Oh ho! I see you’ve found my bonsai trees. I can’t believe I forgot to mention them. That larger one there, the Snowdin Pine, I’ve been taking care of it for the last, oh… 500 years or so? Fortunately, it adapted well to the surface. I was worried the change in its environment would give it too big of a shock.” 

“WHAT?? THEY’RE ALIVE? HOW DID YOU MAKE THEM LOOK LIKE A TREE?”

“They are real trees, just grown small.” 

Papyrus’s jaw dropped. “WHAT??” 

Asgore beamed. “Amazing isn’t it?” Plants and trees can conform to confined spaces, and be shaped to grow certain ways, like my hedges, only smaller. With careful trimming of the roots, branches, and leaves, it can be made to look like a full-sized tree.” 

“YOUR MAJESTY! I’VE DECIDED! I’VE MADE UP MY MIND! I WANT TO TRY RAISING A MINI-TREE! IT'LL BE PERFECT FOR MY MODEL FIGURE COLLECTION!”

“A bonsai… are you sure? It is not typically the easiest for beginners.” 

“YEP!” 

“It would require almost-daily care.”

“ALL RIGHT!” 

“You’ll have to make sure it’s conditions exactly meet the conditions it would need in the wild.”

“ABSOLUTELY! I’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR THE NEXT MODEL KIT TO WORK ON, BUT ALL THE KITS I CAN FIND ARE TOO EASY. AND A LIVING ACTION FIGURE TREE? THIS… THIS WOULD BE PERFECT!” 

Asgore smiled. “Very well. One minute please.” 

The boss monster went into the gardening, and soon returned with some small plant trimming shears, wire, a small bag of Asgore’s special blend of fertilizer, and an old, child-sized watering can. He set them down by the bonsai plants. 

“You can use this bonsai tree I’ve already started. It’s the same kind as some of the hedge trees outside. I'll teach you the tree’s specific needs and show you how to trim it. Oh dear… Unfortunately, we are out of time for today, but if it’s not too much trouble, would you mind coming by another day? I want to make sure you have everything you need for your bonsai.” 

“IT’S NO TROUBLE AT ALL! HOW ABOUT WEDNESDAY?” 

“That’ll work fine! And er… perhaps at a time after the sun has risen?” 

Papyrus picked up the human’s new gift plant in one arm, and shook the king’s hand heartily with the other. “IT'S A PLAN! THIS HAS BEEN AN GREAT DAY! I CAN’T WAIT TO GIVE THIS TO THE HUMAN AND TELL MY OTHER FRIEND ABOUT ALL THE THINGS I LEARNED ABOUT HIS COUSINS! NYEH HEH HEH!” 

***** 

_(A year later…)_

_Papyrus still visited Asgore’s garden from time to time to chat with the king, as well as to maintain the set of traps around the catnip patch, which included a moat, a series of super-soakers on a wire trigger, and audio sounds of dogs barking._

_After several weekly sessions with Asgore on bonsai-keeping, Papyrus was now taking care of his bonsai at home. Every now and then he would send picture updates on the bonsai to Asgore as well as post it to his COOLSKELETON95 social media account. By this time, with the help of the younger monsters, Asgore had eventually learned how to use a smartphone (albeit a very simplified version that was the size of a tablet for his large paws)._

_Finally spring had arrived, a time when the leaves on the trees were full. Asgore was out working in the garden. The tree amalgamate was growing healthily, and it’s first crop of multiple fruits was looking promising._

_“Bzz… bzz…”_

_Asgore’s phone vibrated and chimed, announcing that a new message was received.The boss monster wiped the dirt off his hands onto the apron first before he checked his phone._ _It was a picture message update on Papyrus’s bonsai._ _He opened the message and looked at it_

_The former king smiled at the photograph and a tear began to leak from his eye._

_The miniature hedge tree had been carefully trimmed in the shape of a boss monster’s head with large horns._


End file.
